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May 3, 2009

0 Black Clouds by Ashley Quebedeau

black clouds drift over the full moon
leaving a shadow over this girl

leaving her to herself
in a world of chaos
thats somehow my own little world

yet i feel myself running around in my mind
and seeing walls 
that cage me inside this dead shell
called my body

why do i have to be so lost?
where did i go?
who did i become?

are mostly the questions that run through my mind
as the clouds cascade around my soul

leaving me feeling empty and broken
with no one to save me from myself

while questions swirl around in my head
leaving images of hurting myself 
and the urges of doing it over and over again

when there is no pain inside this zombie 
of a body i have

i think why should i hurt 
when i can take it out on myself

and then it dawns on me that 
i take anything thats sharp
and carve it in my arm

just so i can feel some relief 
in this upside down world of mine
and then the real me comes out of this
comatose alterpersonality

that the clouds erode away
to show a fragile girl
coming out of the darkness
and shining brightly for once in her life

but in the end when the girl 
is finally free from all the evilness 
she has done to herself
that theres no way to erase 
the damage i have done to myself